Burton

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Revision as of 18:41, 14 June 2024 by Legate (talk | contribs) (Created page with "{{Locations|New Land Commonwealth}} Capital of New Land Commonwealth. Origin of Burton according to {{Hn|Sam|0=}}: <pre>"My grandfather's grandfather had spent 40 years looking for a place to put down roots in this land. And you know what? He found the only place for hundreds of miles around that didn't stink. And then the Ogres came and blew his head off—thank the gods that the old fool had fathered some sons who scattered to the eight winds as soon as they grew...")
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Capital of New Land Commonwealth.

Origin of Burton according to Sam Sam:

"My grandfather's grandfather had spent 40 years looking for a place to put down roots in this land. And you know what? He found the only place for hundreds of miles around that didn't stink. And then the Ogres came and blew his head off—thank the gods that the old fool had fathered some sons who scattered to the eight winds as soon as they grew up. My father's grandfather wasn’t one for grand ideas—the place where he settled stank just like everywhere else around here, but it was a good place to fight off enemies. My father's father found out the source of this stench—see the old fountain over there? He was trying to dig a well to get water for it, and it spewed out earth oil. That's what makes this place pong. My father figured out that oil burns well, so he learned how to smelt metal with this nasty but hot fuel. And then some Ogre guys came here from places where it doesn't stink, but one can't get metal for weapons and armor either. Guess what they offered him?”

“Uh, to exchange the metal for something they had a lot of?” - suggested one of the halflings.

“Atta boy! You got it! And you know what ogres have a lot of? Dumbness. Their commander just smashed my dad into a puddle with his club and then said we'd give all the metal to him and they wouldn't kill anymore in return. Maybe. Well, at least not all of us. Maybe. If the mood strikes. Probably not, though. Anyway, he'd done a masterful job of encouraging us to work hard."